neglected and my past

neglected is what i am
neglection is what i'm going thru...
why am i going thru this?
WHY?
have i not suffered enuff?
my past was a stupid disturbing nightmare....
dream as it may be....
nightmare is what it is....
when i was 5...
my father fought with his brothers and sisters after my grandfather died....
that was a terrifying ordeal...
i was 5....
if i was older i would have "gan" them
"gan" as in scold the living shit out of them.....
but i was 5....i cannot do anything
so i was left to stare blankly into space...
dhen when i was 7 my mother got into an arguement with the neighbours upstairs....
her daughters and i had nothing to do with the fight
but the daughters are sibeh guai lan....
when we were playing down stairs "qiqi" one of the daughters and younger one actually tipped a bucket of water purposely on me and my brother
i was of cos pissed but i did not do anything because they were bigger and older then me.....
i was forced to go home wet and crying....
but now i am 15 and they should be working or uni now so i cannot do anything....
i have no revenge...
i cannot give them living hell
mt father patched things up with his bros so they ok ler
but i not ok...
i'm easily offended but i do not show it
instead i show a happy go lucky side....
now my emoing side is showing without me knowing...
lately i have been damn pissed over nothing...
word of warning...
NEVER insult me after 12mid night i will GAN you >:(
nothing now so i no more type ler .....
sianz...
buhbai~

neglection is not
what i can cope with...